Cheers for a Good Life!

A long time ago my friend told me, she saw reels in Instagram, and the reels showing a POV (point of view) of this one lady who has to choose two options. One, do you choose crying in a luxury car, or two, you choose laughing in a bike? And as we already know, majority do not choose that two options. They choose : laughing in a luxury car. Ha, clever!

So, majority answer is they want to laughing in a luxury car, laughing means somehow we kind a feel happy, right? Then I guess to feel happy is one of basic needs for our soul. Maybe we can say, happiness is the ultimate goal in our life (sure, you can agree to disagree, no worries). But, here’s the things, we often misinterpreted the definition of happiness. The truth is, a true happiness is not temporary feeling. For example, we meet a long time best friend in the street and then we agree to have a nostalgic chit chat while sipping a coffee in our favourite cafe. I bet, we will be happy at that moment. (Maybe) it’s one of best moment in our life. But, if you fail to maintain your friendship with him/her and it leads you to loose him/her again, the happiness will fade away. So, a true happiness is not temporary feeling, but an overall quality of life.

The Greek called this, eudaemonia. Roughly translates in English, means “human flourishing” or “the highest good”. Aristotle who is the one bring this idea to the table, refers to a state of living well, achieving one full’s potential, and experiencing deep fulfillment. Unlike happiness (which I have told you before it can be temporary), eudaemonia is all about a life of virtue, purpose, and personal growth. Or we can say, based on my Indonesian favourite writer Henry Manampiring on his book “The Compass”, eudaemonia means a good life, a quality life, or a flourishing life. (I guess now you guys already know the reason behind the title of this blog).

A good life is the matter of quality of our lives, and it is not a feeling in a moment. And you know what, because of it is not depends on a feeling, we can still have a good life even at times we feel sad or mourn. And vice versa, maybe now we feel happy and joy, but the harsh truth is our life is not good. Now you already know, If you see someone is looks so sad or not happy, we can’t say they don’t have a good life, and vice versa, someone is always looks happy and smile all the time, it doesn’t mean they have a good life. Wise man says : Don’t judge book by it’s cover!

And then, the big questions is, how we can achieve a good life? Come here, we gather and listen to the one of the father of wisdom, Aristotle told us a long long time ago in his book “Nichomachean Ethics”. Dear fellows, to have a good life, we have to build the best version, the best character of human being. We must have the characteristics of a supreme human, the virtues : practical wisdom, frugality, courage and fairness.

Maybe you still wandering what does it means by the virtues : practical wisdom, frugality, courage and and fairness. And how to implement it? Here we goes, First, the master virtue : practical wisdom. The Greek called it phronesis. It attributes to the ability to make good judgment and take the right actions in particular situations, with balancing ethical considerations and practical decision making. This ability is needed to reach a good life, because all the options in our lives coming from this virtue. From the small decision, like choosing whether we want to go have a coffee with friends or stay at home to do the laundry. Or a big decision, whether we want to resign to focus taking care of our kids or stay working because we still need our pay check to provide our house hold. We have to think about it clearly, and make a good judgment, and already anticipate the consequences behind our decisions.

Second, frugality. Frugality is the quality for being prudent and economical with resources, money or time. Meaning, we are avoiding unnecessary expenses, living simply and making the most of available resources. We often heard that frugality means we are living cheap and miserly, no it’s far from that. It’s all about living intentionally, being mindful of our spending habits and prioritizing what truly adds value to our life. The truth is, if we live harmonious with the nature, our needs as a human is not that much, the problem is, Our basic needs often take a backseat to the endless desires shaped by our opinions. For example, our needs to drink. Practically, we only needs a cheap drinking water to survive, but what happens is, our opinion demand us to have an expensive coffee from viral and trending cafe that we seen in the social media. Familiar? ofcourse.

Third, courage. According to our father Aristotle, courage is a virtue that enables individuals to face and overcome fear, pain or danger. It is a balance between these two : cowardice and recklessness. Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the willingness to act in the face of fear. For him, true courage involves enduring fear for the right reasons, at the right time, in the right way, and for a good cause. Courage is not only a feeling or an instinct, but a rational choice that involves weighing the risks and benefits of a situation. This virtue is not only apply to great cause or noble cause like a soldier of whistleblower, but we can find it in the daily life. For example, we bring together our courage to share our unpopular opinion in front of our colleagues. Dare to be different, as long as our opinion is accountable.

Last, fairness. A virtue that involves treating others justly and impartly. Means, giving people what they deserve, balancing equality and proportionally, and applying justice with compassion and wisdom. I will give you an easy example, as a parent, it doesn’t mean we have to give something to our kids equally. We give our first child laptop, because she/he need it for college. It doesn’t mean we have to give laptop to our 9 years old. Because she/he won’t need it, if we give it to her/him, it will cause only harm.

We can’t choose which one we want to adapt, we have to adapt all of it. When we facing some kind of situation, then these all four virtues will support and complement each other. By then, we must always practice to use all these virtues. We must maintain and strengthen a virtue which already strong in ourselves, and improve a virtue which is weak.

Now, I will give you a question for you to think deeply and honestly……Drum roll!. Among of all four virtues, which one is your strength and which one is your weakness? Ask your self.

Love,

Kirana Sidin