Recently, I’ve made this decision, and the way I deliver the decision is little bit unusual. I know it’s not common, but I have my own reason. More over I already analize from all the perspectives, there is nothing wrong about the way I deliver it. It’s not common in the eyes of society, yes. But in the eyes of truth, no problem. And I have considered if I do it, it will bring excess, either it’s positive or negative. If it’s positive, sure I have nothing to worry about. But to be honest, if the excess is negative, I won’t mind either. As I know, special for this case, whatever the ways I deliver the decision, it will have negative excess. I only have to choose the one that more convenient and essentials to me.
Because here’s the things, people will always have something to talk about us. More over if they find us not supporting their intention or agenda. They tend to make a story or judgement into our action. They will have bad opinion about us. But here’s the good news. That’s not our job to worry about, as people’s action and people’s opinion are something beyond our control. That’s on them. It’s a non sense if we think we can always control other’s opinion and actions. What we have to do is we must have the ability to control ourselves regarding other’s opinion, interpretation or judgement whether we see or experiencing something or even received bad treatment from others. What we control is, How we react to criticism, how we present ourselves, and how much we let others’ views affect us. We should focus on our own actions, character, and responses. We can’t easily carried away into the wrong interpretations and continue to be immersed in negative emotions. Here’s the example, someone is critize us badly, instead of we get carried away with the critics, and get angry to the messanger, or maybe made us down, we can choose to ignore unfair critism without letting it affect our confidence and values about ourselves. Stay calm and respond elegantly instead of getting defensive. Wise man says : “You Don’t Control What Happens, You Control How You Respond”.
It’s kinda give us space to reflect on our actions and emotions, gaining valuable insights into ourselves. We can stop focusing on what we can’t control and start making the most of what we can. Because we already not get carried away with other’s actions and opinions, we can easily tell to ourselves, it’s your problem to have that opinion toward me, it’s not my problem AT ALL. It’s about You, not about Me. By then, we won’t bothered at all and focus making the best of what we can, to our character, to our values, to our goals. There’s so much we can do by not focusing on other’s. We can continue the journey of self improvement without having to look back. We have full commitment to our values and principles. We believe in ourselves, we believe in our self-worth. The other’s opinion and actions doesn’t define our self-worth. Because we are more than their opinion.
We all know Monalisa, the masterpiece art. There were so many peoples insult or even hate it, but the value of it will never changed, it remain priceless. So does the other’s bad opinion and action toward us, don’t let it affects our character and our value, because it’s only a word. Stand to our ground, don’t lower our ground acting like them. Kill them with kindness!
By knowing this principle, I dare to say our life will be more calm, easier, happier than ever. It’s like a tons of burden shifted from our chest and heart. We feel so light and can dancing to whatever genre of life bring to us. We ready to face it, without hesitation, without fear. We only need to be wiser than before to really stick to the principle, acknowledge indeed there’s something that beyond our control, what matters is how we respond. Here’s my favourite quote from Marcus Aurelius : You have power over your mind not outside events. Realize this and you will find strength. Hail to the Caesar!
Love,
Kirana
