It was a long night at Kuala Lumpur International Airport. Our flight was delayed from 19.25 to 00.30, which is heavily delayed. It’s tiring since my husband and I usually sleep early. Although it’s past our bedtime, we still managed to enjoy the time; we ate, drank coffee, listened to music, and watched a movie. We truly understand that the delay is something beyond our control, and many passengers are in the same situation. So, why should we feel sorry for ourselves when others are experiencing the same?
But, we couldn’t help to feel relieved when the airline staff opened the boarding gate. Finally, we could fly home! All the passengers boarded the plane and took their seats, ready to fly. One of the flight attendants called a passenger’s name. I wondered, what was happening? Was something going on? It turned out the passenger was celebrating a birthday. It was just five minutes before midnight. Everyone sang Happy Birthday together. It’s like a ‘sweet moment’ after a long, tiring night.
The plane was on the runway, ready to take off. Since I felt so sleepy, I closed my eyes to sleep, but I felt the plane shaking. After a moment, the shaking stopped, so I tried to sleep again. However, I noticed the lights were off and the seatbelt sign was still on. Ten minutes later, we experienced heavy turbulence. I opened my eyes to see that the plane was heavily shaking, and all the passengers seemed aware of the situation. It’s continuing to shake, and suddenly, the plane dropped, feeling like a rollercoaster ride. It’s terrifying! All the passengers were screaming, I was screaming too, and my husband held my hand to comfort me; my hands were still shaking afterwards. A flight attendant announced that a doctor was needed because one of the passengers needed medical treatment probably fainted and had gotten shocked after the incident. Thankfully, after that, the pilot managed the situation and we landed safely at Soekarno-Hatta Airport, Jakarta, Indonesia. Home Sweet Home.
When I think about it, yes, I can tell, this was the most terrifying flight I’ve ever had in my life. I mean, I have faced heavy turbulence before, but surely not like this one. This one is another level. And something that crossed my mind when it was happening, I felt as if death was close. I asked myself, is it time? Though I wanted to deny it, I surrendered to whatever would happen. I pictured my children’s faces, and felt sad and sorrowful that they might not have us. My husband told me he felt the same. But God is good; He allowed us and all the passengers to reunite with our families.
I always have this cocky mind, or probably feeling? The death is still far away because I always try to live healthy, live a normal life, and try to follow His commands. I believed God would keep me safe from death for a long time, perhaps until I grow old. Then, He answered it right away. And I paid hard for it. Lesson learned. Probably, God wanted me to remember that I’m not special, and I shouldn’t feel that way. As someone who claims to be stoic, I should know the phrase: Memento Mori, which means Remember that you will die. The phrase was there to remind us that we have to stay humble, and not to become overly confident in our health, power or anything else.
I still have to remind myself every day, every morning this thought:
“I could leave life right now. Let that determine what I do, say, and think.”
“Remember, time is limited — is this how you want to spend it?”
“If today was my last, did I live the way I wanted?”
That short moment on the plane, probably only 1 minute, but succeeded in reminding me indeed life is short, and death is near. I need to use my time and my life wisely. Focus on matters, something that will increase my gratitude and presence. Knowing that moments are limited makes ordinary things extraordinary: my child’s laugh, a dinner with friends, even my morning coffee made by my husband.
Memento Mori – Remember That You Will Die. Not to scare me, but to wake me up. Stop treating today like it’s unlimited. Life is short. Focus on what matters. Love louder. Fail faster. Live deeper.
Because one day, you won’t get “later’.
Love,
Kirana
